Fetishes and Kinks A to Z: A Glossary of the Ones That Did Not Get Their Own Guide

This is the glossary: every fetish and kink that people ask about and that did not warrant a full guide of its own, in alphabetical order, each with a plain definition, a note on how common it is, the one safety point that matters, and a link to the full guide where one exists. The long tail of human sexual interest is very long, and most entries here are things that a great many people have and almost nobody talks about. The aim is the same as the rest of this site: to tell you what the thing is, that you are not alone in it, and what to watch out for, in a sentence or two rather than an essay.

I have tried to be honest about the dangerous ones. Most of what follows is harmless. A few entries (blood, breath, intoxication, guns, scat) are things that people do and that kill or injure people every year, and for those the safety note is the entry. Where a kink has a full guide on this site, the glossary entry is short and the link is the point; where it does not, the entry is as complete as a paragraph can be. If you are looking for the big ones (feet, latex, voyeurism, CBT, watersports, feederism, furry, findom), they are in common fetishes explained; if you are looking for roleplay kinks (breeding, praise, degradation, CNC, free use, somno, daddy, pet play), they are in roleplay and fantasy kinks.

This is the last chapter of common fetishes explained. For the general questions (what makes something a fetish, whether yours is normal, whether you can get rid of it), see what is a fetish and can you get rid of a fetish.

A to B

Age play. Consensual roleplay of ages other than one's own, between adults. Covered in littles and caregivers.

Armpit fetish (maschalagnia). Attraction to armpits: the look, the hair, the smell, the sweat. Common enough to have a community; harmless; hygiene is a preference the partners negotiate.

Asphyxiation, see Choking and Breath play.

Balloon fetish (looners). Arousal from balloons: inflating, popping, or not popping ("non-poppers"), the feel, the sound. A well-known niche with its own community. Harmless.

Belly fetish. Attraction to bellies: soft, round, stuffed, or pregnant. Overlaps with feederism and pregnancy fetish. Harmless.

Bimbofication. A transformation fantasy; see size and transformation kinks.

Blood kink (hematolagnia). Arousal from blood: seeing it, drawing it (through cutting, needles, or biting), tasting it, or the fantasy of it (vampire roleplay). Fantasy and roleplay versions are harmless. Real blood play is one of the highest-risk practices in kink: blood carries HIV, hepatitis B and C, and other infections; cutting and needle play require sterile technique, single-use tools, knowledge of anatomy, and training from people who do it; and biting that breaks skin is a bite wound with a high infection rate. Tasting blood is unsafe unless both partners are tested and the blood is from a sterile source. The community treats edge play of this kind as instruction-first, and so do I. A vampire fantasy with fake blood and a biting that does not break skin gives most of the thrill.

BNWO fetish. "Black New World Order," an online pornographic fantasy genre built on racial domination and the supposed sexual superiority of Black men, consumed mostly by white men as a form of race-based humiliation. It is a race-play fantasy, and race play is one of the most contested areas of kink: consensual between adults, but built on real racism, and distressing to many people of the race being fetishised. If it is your interest, know what it is, keep it to consenting adults who have chosen it, and do not bring it to people who did not. Related: raceplay generally, which is negotiated like any heavy humiliation and with far more care.

Boot fetish. See boot worship.

Breath play. Restricting breathing for arousal: hands on the throat, bags, hoods, smothering, rebreathing. It is the practice that kills more kinksters than any other, because there is no safe way to do it: a few seconds of carotid pressure can cause loss of consciousness, cardiac arrest, or stroke with no warning, and there is no safeword for a person who has passed out. The community's honest position is that breath play cannot be made safe, only less dangerous, and that it should never be done alone, never with pressure on the front or sides of the neck, never with anything that cannot be removed instantly, and never by anyone who has not understood that it can kill a healthy person on the first attempt. The fantasy of it, a hand resting on the throat with no pressure, gives most people what they want. See Choking.

C to D

Choking (is choking a kink?). Yes, and the most common dangerous one. Searches for "is choking a kink" are mostly from young people who have seen it in porn and found it normalised. A hand on the throat as a gesture of dominance, with no pressure on the airway or the arteries, is a kink and is fine. Actual choking, pressure on the throat that restricts air or blood, is breath play, and the entry above applies in full: it can cause unconsciousness, brain injury, stroke, or death without warning, and "light" choking has killed healthy people. If you want the feeling, the dominant's hand goes on the collarbone or the back of the neck, or rests on the throat with no squeeze; if a partner is choking you with pressure, that is not a kink you agreed to safely, whatever porn has suggested.

CNC. Consensual non-consent; see what is CNC.

Corruption kink. See degradation kink.

Cross-dressing. Wearing clothes of another gender; a fetish for some, an identity or pleasure with no sexual element for others, and forced feminisation when it is used as a submission or humiliation kink (see femdom). Harmless and common.

Cum fetish / cum kink. Arousal from semen: seeing it, being covered in it ("facials," "bukkake"), swallowing it, playing with it, or the idea of it. One of the most common fluid kinks, present in a large share of pornography, and largely harmless; semen carries STIs, so the usual testing and barrier rules apply for anyone not in a tested, fluid-bonded relationship. Related: snowballing (passing semen between mouths), cum eating instruction (CEI; see degradation), and creampie fetish (see breeding kink).

Diaper fetish (ABDL). See littles and caregivers.

Dollification. A transformation and objectification kink in which a person is made into a doll: posed, dressed, still, silent, used. Overlaps with material fetishes, bondage, and sensory deprivation. Harmless with the usual bondage and breathing rules.

E to G

Electrical play (e-stim). Using purpose-built devices (TENS-style units, violet wands, electro toys) to deliver sensation. Thrilling and safe within strict rules: purpose-built equipment only, never above the waist (the heart), never with pacemakers or heart conditions, never on broken skin, never with water nearby for mains-powered devices. Household electricity is never used. Learn it from a class.

Exhibitionism. See voyeurism and exhibitionism.

Facesitting (is facesitting a kink?). Yes: one partner sits on the other's face for oral sex, for smothering, or as an act of dominance ("queening" when a woman does it). Extremely common and a femdom staple. The safety note is breathing: the person underneath must be able to breathe or to signal, the weight is controlled, and anything that fully covers nose and mouth for more than a few seconds is breath play. A tap-out signal is agreed before anyone sits.

Fart fetish (eproctophilia). Arousal from farts: the sound, the smell, being farted on, or the humiliation. A real and surprisingly discussed fetish, almost entirely harmless, and mostly a humiliation or intimacy kink with a gaseous medium. The only safety note is that it should not be combined with a hood or enclosure that restricts breathing.

Foot fetish. See what is a foot fetish.

Forced orgasm. See orgasm control.

Fur fetish. Attraction to the material fur (real or fake); a material fetish like latex and leather. Distinct from furry (see is furry a fetish).

Giantess / macrophilia. See size kink.

Gloves fetish. Arousal from gloves: leather, latex, satin, rubber; wearing, seeing, being touched by. A material and clothing fetish; harmless.

Gun play (gunplay kink). Using firearms, real or replica, in a scene for fear, dominance, or roleplay. With a real firearm, there is no safe version: unloaded guns have killed people in scenes, and the four rules of firearm safety (treat every gun as loaded, never point at anything you are not willing to destroy) are incompatible with the kink. The community's position is replicas only, clearly marked and verified by both partners before the scene, never a real gun in the room. Even then, a replica can be mistaken for real by a neighbour or the police, which is its own risk. The fear and dominance the kink is after can be had with a knife-shaped prop, a blindfold, and a voice.

H to L

Hair fetish (trichophilia). Attraction to hair: long hair, short hair, specific colours, hair play (brushing, pulling, washing), and hair cutting or shaving as a scene (which overlaps with humiliation and control). Common, and nearly harmless; hair pulling is done from the base of the scalp with a full grip, never from the ends.

Hand fetish (cheirophilia). Attraction to hands: the shape, the fingers, the veins, watching hands work, being touched by them. The second most common body-part fetish after feet, and the one with the fewest problems; the whole kink can be practised in public without anyone noticing.

Humiliation. See degradation kink.

Hypnosis kink (hypnokink, erotic hypnosis). Arousal from being hypnotised, from hypnotising, or from the fantasy of mind control and trance. A real practice with skilled practitioners and a large online community; the trance states are real for suggestible people. Safety is consent: all suggestions negotiated in advance, no suggestions that persist beyond the scene without agreement, and awareness that a hypnotised person's consent is compromised in the moment, which is why limits are set before. Recorded "files" from unknown sources are a risk.

Impact play. See impact play 101.

Inflation fetish. See size kink.

Intox kink (intoxication fetish). Arousal from being drunk or high, from a partner being intoxicated, or from the loss of control it brings. A real interest and a dangerous one: intoxication and consent are incompatible, which is why every guide on this site says "sober"; a scene with an intoxicated partner is a scene with a partner who cannot safeword, cannot report numbness or distress, and cannot reliably consent. The community's rule is that intox play, if done at all, is done with mild intoxication, with limits agreed sober, with the sober partner holding all the responsibility, and never combined with bondage, breath play, or impact. The fantasy version (roleplaying drunkenness, "forced" drinking of water) carries none of the risk. Related: "forced intox" and chemsex, which the community treats as outside safe practice.

Knife play. Using a blade for fear and sensation: the cold edge drawn across skin, the threat. Done with dull or unsharpened blades, never with pressure, never near the eyes, neck, or major vessels, and never with a sharp blade on a restrained person who might move. Cutting that breaks skin is blood play (see above). The fear is the kink; the blade does not need to be able to cut.

Lactation fetish. Arousal from breast milk: seeing, drinking, inducing lactation, or adult nursing relationships (ANR), in which a partner nurses regularly. Harmless, intimate, and more common than its visibility; milk from a healthy partner is safe to drink, and inducing lactation is possible with persistence and sometimes medication under advice.

Leather, latex, rubber. See the materials guide.

M to O

Medical play (medplay kink). Roleplay and sensation play built on medical scenarios: examinations, nurses and doctors, speculums, enemas, catheters, injections (real or simulated), restraint on an exam table, the vocabulary and the gear. Common, with a large community and a gear market. Safety follows the gear: examination and sensation versions are harmless; anything inserted (speculums, catheters, enema equipment) needs sterile or properly cleaned equipment and the anatomy knowledge from sounding; real needles and injections are blood play and instruction-first.

Mummification. See bondage tape.

Navel fetish (alvinolagnia). Attraction to navels; harmless; a sub-category of belly fetish.

Nylon and stocking fetish. Arousal from hosiery: stockings, tights, the feel and look of nylon, the feet in them. One of the most common clothing fetishes and the easiest to share; harmless.

Objectification. Being treated as an object (furniture, a toy, a doll, a footstool) as a submission kink. Harmless with the usual bondage and breathing rules; see hoods and furniture.

Omorashi. See watersports.

P to R

Pain kink (algolagnia, masochism). Arousal from receiving pain; the masochist's half of S/M. Extremely common, with a well-understood physiology (endorphins, adrenaline, the conversion of intense sensation to pleasure at the right moment), and safe within the rules of impact play and sensation safety. The sadist's half is covered in roles.

Pleasure kink. A term people search for and that has no settled meaning; it is usually used for one of three things: a "pleasure dom" dynamic in which the dominant controls through pleasure rather than pain (overstimulation, forced orgasms, denial; see orgasm control); the kink of giving pleasure as service (see service sub); or simply the opposite of a pain kink. If someone says they have a pleasure kink, ask which.

Pregnancy fetish (maiesiophilia). Attraction to pregnant bodies, or arousal at the idea of pregnancy; see breeding kink. Harmless.

Primal play. See pet play and primal play.

Quicksand, mud, and wet-and-messy (WAM, sploshing). Arousal from being covered in mud, food, paint, slime, or other messy substances, or from wet clothing. A cheerful niche with its own community and events; harmless, with the one rule that nothing goes on the face that restricts breathing and nothing goes in the body that is not meant to.

Race play. Roleplay built on racial dynamics and slurs, as humiliation or dominance. The most contested kink in the community: consensual between adults, built on real history and real harm, and deeply distressing to many people. It is negotiated like the heaviest humiliation, with the person of the race in question setting every term, and it is never brought into public spaces or to people who did not choose it. See BNWO above.

Rope. See what is shibari.

S

Scat (coprophilia). Sexual interest in faeces. Rare, and carrying serious infection risk (bacteria, parasites, hepatitis A) especially through the mouth and mucous membranes; see the note in watersports. Not a practice I will write a guide to.

Sensation play. Non-painful or mildly painful sensation: feathers, ice, wax, pinwheels, fur, vampire gloves, temperature, textures, often with a blindfold. The gentlest kink on the site and the best first scene for most couples; see gear for beginners.

Shoe fetish (retifism). Arousal from shoes: heels, boots, sneakers, the shoe itself or its removal. Closely related to foot fetish and often coexisting; harmless; see foot fetish.

Sissification / forced feminisation. See femdom.

Smell fetish (olfactophilia). Arousal from body odours: sweat, feet, armpits, genitals, worn clothing. Common, harmless, and rooted in the strong link between smell and arousal; most people have a mild version.

Smoking fetish (capnolagnia). Arousal from watching someone smoke, or from smoking during sex. A well-established niche; the only safety note is the obvious one about smoking.

Somnophilia. See what is a somno kink.

Spanking. See impact play 101.

Spit fetish. Arousal from saliva: spitting on or into a partner, being spat on, spit as humiliation or intimacy. Common, nearly harmless (saliva carries little; a cold sore is the exception), and a staple of degradation play.

Stuffing. See feederism.

T to Z

Tentacles. A fantasy kink from Japanese art; lives in art and toys (tentacle-shaped dildos exist); harmless.

Tickling (knismolagnia, titillagnia). Arousal from tickling or being tickled, often combined with restraint. Harmless with one rule: a tickled person cannot stop laughing to say no, so a non-verbal safeword is essential, and tickling a restrained person past their signal is a consent violation that feels like one.

Trampling. See foot fetish.

Transformation fetish. See size kink.

Uniform fetish. Arousal from uniforms: nurse, police, military, school, maid, business. A clothing fetish and a roleplay kink; harmless; see roleplay kinks.

Vore. See size kink and vore.

Voyeurism. See voyeurism and exhibitionism.

Wax play. Dripping candle wax on skin for heat and sensation. Safe with the right candles (soy or paraffin candles made for play, which melt at low temperatures; never beeswax, never decorative candles with additives, never anything that burns hot), dripped from height to cool in the air, never on the face or genitals at first, and never on broken skin. A towel and a scraper for removal.

Wet and messy. See Quicksand and mud above.

Zentai. Full-body spandex suits that cover everything including the face; an enclosure and material fetish, harmless with the breathing rule (thin fabric only over the face).

Frequently asked questions

What is a hand fetish?

Attraction to hands: their shape, fingers, veins, movement, and touch. It is the second most common body-part fetish after feet, is entirely harmless, and can be enjoyed without anyone knowing.

What is a fart fetish?

Arousal from farts: the sound, the smell, being farted on, or the humiliation of it. A real and much-discussed fetish, essentially harmless, usually a humiliation or intimacy kink. The only rule is not to combine it with anything that restricts breathing.

What is a cum fetish?

Arousal from semen: seeing it, being covered in it, swallowing it, or the idea of it. One of the most common fluid kinks; semen carries STIs, so testing and barriers apply outside a fluid-bonded relationship.

What is a blood kink?

Arousal from blood: seeing, drawing, tasting, or the vampire fantasy. The fantasy and roleplay versions are harmless; real blood play carries serious infection risk (HIV, hepatitis) and requires sterile technique, single-use tools, anatomy knowledge, and training. Fake blood and biting that does not break skin give most of the thrill.

What is intox kink?

Arousal from being or seeing a partner intoxicated. It conflicts with consent, since an intoxicated partner cannot safeword or report distress; if done at all, it is mild, with limits agreed sober, the sober partner holding all responsibility, and never combined with bondage, breath play, or impact. The roleplay version carries no risk.

What is medplay kink?

Medical play: roleplay and sensation built on examinations, nurses and doctors, speculums, enemas, and restraint on an exam table. Common and mostly harmless; inserted equipment needs sterile or cleaned gear and anatomy knowledge, and real needles are blood play.

Is choking a kink?

A hand on the throat with no pressure is a common and safe dominance gesture. Actual pressure on the throat is breath play, which can cause unconsciousness, stroke, or death without warning and has killed healthy people on the first attempt. There is no safe way to do it; the gesture without the squeeze gives the feeling.

Is facesitting a kink?

Yes: sitting on a partner's face for oral sex, smothering, or dominance, and a femdom staple. The rule is breathing: the person underneath must be able to breathe or signal, weight is controlled, and a tap-out is agreed before anyone sits.

What is a pleasure kink?

The term has no settled meaning. It usually means a pleasure-dom dynamic (control through overstimulation, forced orgasms, or denial), the kink of giving pleasure as service, or simply the opposite of a pain kink. Ask which is meant.

What is gun play kink?

Using firearms, real or replica, in a scene for fear or dominance. With a real gun there is no safe version and unloaded guns have killed people in scenes; the community's position is clearly marked replicas only, verified by both partners, with no real firearm in the room. The fear can be had with a prop and a voice.

What is BNWO fetish?

An online pornographic fantasy genre built on racial domination and the supposed sexual superiority of Black men, consumed mostly as race-based humiliation. It is race play, the most contested area of kink: consensual between adults who chose it, built on real racism, and never brought to people who did not.